Ames Progressive

Those of you that have decided to read both parts of my blog must be thinking he’s in complete denial over his dreadful Knicks. How sad. Actually, Doc Brown hooked me up with his De Lorean and during the night when I transform into Tyler Durdon - my alternate persona, I travel back to the ‘90s and watch my Knicks bust through the postseason. During the day I’m just some unemployed writer gabbing away about how the NBA Playoffs provides enough stimulus for me to numb myself from the disappointments of life. Onto the lighter side of things…Western Conference

1. Lakers vs. 8. Nuggets

Here I am for the past two years dipping into alternate careers other than the lucrative field of journalism and yet ESPN allows another guy from Queens, Steven A. Smith, to jabber away like he invented the game and continue to dilute himself with his obvious man-crush for Alan Iverson. Granted Smith writes for a paper in Philadelphia and AI holds the third highest scoring average in league history, but first Smith predicts the Nuggets to win it all before the season and then last night he claims the Hornets would be better off facing the Mavs than the Nuggets.

Now Steven, I went to the debut of your short-lived interview show on ESPN and believe you are a humble guy who I wish nothing but the best for, even if you insist on portraying a caricature on television. Howevaaa, as you like to say, AI, Melo, Camby and the boys from the Mile High City have given up 119 points to our beloved Knicks, 135 to the Bulls, and most recently with a playoff spot in the balance, lost to the Kings at home before surrendering 151 points to the hapless and homeless Sonics.

Surely the series affords for high scoring and star power that will attract but for Steven A. that bold and daring prophesy will live no more following the first round. Just wish I could say the same thing about your stint on air. Damn I’m one bitter fuck.

Prediction - Lakers in Five

2. Hornets vs. Mavs

Watching last night’s season finale with the Mavs and Hornets sharing more streaks than, well my mind went a certain analogous route but I’ll spare you the image, I vacillated - which is steadily becoming my favorite word, between which team to pick for what will be a tremendous series.

I am going with the Mavs for the very same reason I will argue with anyone willing that Chris Paul deserves the MVP. No doubt it’s a superstar-driven league but the West features too many to sort. Instead, depth over a rigorous postseason that will last after school ends represents the difference in who advances. In the house of the rising sun, CP3’s exit would ensure darkness. The Hornets are without question a lottery team without the precocious point. He can dominate for so long against an experienced team in Dallas that is only two years removed from a Finals appearance. Someone else will need to step up and that remains doubtful.

Combine the aforementioned breakdown with Dallas’ bench, which even though is not as menacing as in the past, features a versatile and veteran guard in Jerry Stackhouse and a beast in Brandon Bass, who I am predicting to have a monster postseason, and the Hornets’ 0-11 record in Dallas’ new arena and I foresee an upset - only according to seeding of course.

Plus, for those keeping up with my posts, do you think I’d devote an entire blog comparing the saga of the Mavs to Star Wars if I didn’t think Dirk and company could at least escape the first round?

Prediction - Mavs in Six

3. Spurs vs. 6. Suns

That burning questions regarding the best series of the first round in the West finds an overwhelming answer in what has been the best rivalry in the conference over the past three seasons. Suns’ General Manager Steve Kerr pulled off what I called a brash and reactionary move at the time, but to elevate a team with a closing window, as Nash fights off an uncooperative body, the Suns needed to add size.

Tin Duncan has won four titles with the Spurs over the same time that Shaq has won three with the Lakers and one with the Heat. Duncan stands as more of the centerpiece of the current Spurs as Shaq defers to Amare and Nash. But this scintillating series goes a long way in settling the dispute over who ranks higher on the all-time big man list.

The Big Fundamental, Tony Parker and Manu “The Flop” Ginobli vs. The Big Cactus, Amare and Nash will steal the headlines but three factors nudge me toward going with the boys from the desert to finally topple their nemesis.

A) Even with the addition of Shaq, the Suns can go small. The only reason for San Antonio’s failure to pull off a three-peat is because Dallas coach Avery Johnson instilled a smaller and quicker lineup in the second round of the ‘06 playoffs. Like a game of darts, the Mavs set the pace and the Spurs followed one step behind. The Suns defeated the Spurs last week with a corps of Lilliputians wrecking havoc as the 6’8 Boris Diaw stuffed the paint with Raja Bell, Grant Hill, Leandro Barbosa and Gordon Giricek wearing down the lumbering Spurs.

B) He might not earn a ticket to the Hall of Fame but Big Shot Robert Horry’s mark on the game over the past decade can be quantified with seven rings on three different teams. As a member of the Spurs, Horry knocked down a crucial basket to win Game Five of the ‘05 Finals against the Pistons. He then manipulated the term “Big Shot” by hip-checking Steve Nash into the scorer’s table during last season’s series, prompting Amare and Diaw to flee the bench and earn critical suspensions, resulting in a tarnished, yet measurable series victory for San Antonio. The 37-year-old has played only 45 games this season. With no word concerning his return and another sharp-shooter, Brent Barry, sidelined recently as well, the burden belongs solely to Ginboli to connect from the perimeter.

C) Dynasty - succession of hereditary rulers. If we consider the Spurs a family, wouldn’t their reign seem less than a dynasty. The Celtics of the ‘80s were a terrific team but no one calls them a dynasty as they won three titles out of succession while the Lakers won five, including two in ‘87 and ‘88. The Spurs lost to a beatable L.A. team in ‘04 and Dallas in ‘06. With legitimate title contenders located between them and the Pacific, I cannot see them reaching down and exuding Jordan-like determination when needed. But then again I despise Duncan and the Spurs so maybe it’s my bias talking.

Prediction - Suns in Seven

4. Jazz vs. 5. Rockets

Way to shoot my load before the end. Clearly the Jazz are the better team especially with the news that Houston’s point guard and Queens’ product, Raefer Alston will miss at least two games. There remains only one way the Rockets can advance: by winning it for T-Mac.

McGrady broke down last season after a Game Seven loss to the Jazz at home as he once again failed to win a playoff series - an astonishing feat considering his superstar status. As usual, I see T-Mac forcing bad shots at critical junctures in this series but this Houston team won 22-straight games at one point this season because of selflessness and stifling defense. With inspired ball and crisp passing, the Rockets can win. However, a 37-4 home mark and the reincarnation of Stockton and Malone - Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer playing with confidence after last season’s playoff success will be enough to once again incite tears from T-Mac and this time possibly Dikembe.

Prediction - Jazz in Six